Pleasant surprises in sleep mode and writing about each others work

Dear All

I hope everyone is well!! What's everyone up to at the moment?

I had such a nice weekend- and going back to work this morning I felt like I had been away for a week- which I haven't felt for a while. rachel, it was so good to see you and I really did enjoy teh boat party....I'm a bit gutted I can't make the march or the film festival....next year though!!

Franko, it was good to see you and beuy, I felt really relaxed- I think for my other one to ones I have been quite anxious..., well just not so relaxed, but it was good to chat and have some gorgeous food, (Thank you very much!).

I woke up this morning and as I glanced at teh clock I had that awful Monday morning feeling, urrgghh, I don't want to get out of bed, but then yippeee, I hadn't put that clock back, so the nicest feeling of having an hour longer to lie in bed and drift in and out of a light sleep. i think maybe I will leave that clock an dhour fast, so I can have a few more mornings of pleasant surprises whilst I'm still in that sleepy mode.

the internet seems really slow tonight, the blog took ages to open- is this because it's getting bigger, or because my interent boradband just isn't particularly fast?

WRITING ABOUT EACH OTHERS WORK

Just before we left Wysing Rachel suggested we might write about each others work.....as a way of gaining insight into what other people see in our work, how they perceive our practice....and for us to write, to engage in writing, but not statements about our own work. I'm really up for doing it, and I don't think it has to be too full on- just as much as we want, in what way we want. Is anyone else interested?

I got a lot out of being at Wysing, and there were things people said to me- observations about my way of working, my practice, that came as really precious and insightful thoughts, and I think they were really, are really, important for me, and how I have changed how I look at my practice, even if only subtly.

I also think that it would be a good way of opening up what began in the crit. In my one to one with Franko yesterday I said how I felt we were all really tired during the crit, and afterwards, I wished I had said more, been more honest and open about what I thought and felt about what work was being shown, how the week was for people... maybe for me, writing about people's work now, or at least writing about one or two peoples work would be a way of being more open and honest...or more to teh point, just expanding on what was or wasn't said during the crit we had.

Well, I am going to do this, just start writing stuff down.... but it would be really good to do it as a group, to invlove each other, support each other...?

I don't want teh mentoring scheme to come to an end, and I know it doesn't have to. I really like what you said in your post Franko, about us supporting each other and teh group growing rather than us having 'finished' and a new group starting.

I might struggle to cook something for 4 december. I am going to Paris teh weekend beforehand, but then I guess I just have to be imaginative about it...I'm really looking forward to it though.

Right, before I go, (need to drag my sister away from teh piano...an hour of her playing silent night with one finger very slowly is doing my nut!), I am in London on Saturday and was wondering if anyone would like to meet for coffee? Or in fact meet to do something for fireworks night? I was thinking I would just come down for Sarurday, but if anyone has any ideas for something on Saturday night??

With love to everyone

Katherine.

121 and things...

hello sweeties , few things..
THE 4 december at SOUTH LONDON GALLERY , we are all going to bring food we have coocked for the new boys and girls on the mentoring ,,,
IT was actualy rachell idea to do this rather than getting catering in .. i think is a great idea ,
also yes i want to claryfy that off course that this blog will be still accessible for all the mentorees past and present, really i just want this to continue , i mean to support each other and been involved , in a way i think the new group is luckier has there is a better structure to welccome them in to.. and i think can you immagine in 5 years time ? or 10 years time ? the network nd stucture this "group will have ? I hope so .. so i don't want to hear about the mentoring finishing because is not the case if you don't want it to. and i don't want it to either . so really is about finding ways to make it work by . and it can ..
ALSO another thing i was talking to katherine today and she mentioned this idea that every b ody in the group should write on 1 personn work in the group ,, i sugest each person choose a person them self .. [ if you want to write on more than 1 person that is cool.
ANOTHER imprtant thing, DON'T FORGET to wrte about you esperience of this year as part of this group. and to arrange the 121 with me beforre the 4 december and also indipendently the 121 with manick or frances.


and yes the photo here of my friend ron athey and dominique , is to remind you that they are working on a performane toghether from the 7 november til the 10 [ party on the 10 after performance ] at the chelsea theatre in london ] x x x

Hi, still trying to load images from the mac. Madeline , how did you achieve it?
Just tried it using Firefox instead of Navigator and it doesn't work either.
Hope the boat Party was fun.
Franko , are you free soon for a 1 2 1 ?
Shall I call you?
xxxxx

I seem to be locked out of the blog, am i being shunned? if i write a reply to a post without logging in direct through blogger ie just replying by viewing de-mentored, it says i'm only allowed my post published when the author has authorised it.

here is my third attempt today...

I left a post earlier saying pretty much:

yep still like to come, be lovely to see Rachel, Katherine, Nina, Lucille (?).

I'm heading down from Stokey, does anyone fancy meeting for a drink first and finding it together? And Rachel am i right that it ends in camden, cos that esier for me to get home from!

a bientot
madx

BOAT PARTY!

Who is still coming on Saturday, Katherine I believe you are still coming, how about Madeline, Nina and Steven? anyone else up for feminist halloween punch action?
xx

An essay I wrote about listening , silence and acting

Katherine, this is an essay a wrote earlier this year on that body politic course I did. We discussed silence and listening a lot... some of the things you wrote made me think that I' like you to read it, rachel xx

I am silent every day.
How could I not be?
How could silence not be negative/be positive?

Powerful acts of silence I can think of…….

Hunger strikes

The three asylum seekers who I saw in the papers who sewed up their lips in protest against their deportation.

Slow claps

Women accused of witchcraft who in their hundreds held hands and drown themselves together in the sea

When I think of war I am always greeted with the same image…….

Footage taken during the Falklands of young boys, soldiers, boarding the boats to go to war, buying crisps and chocolate as if on a school outing. This makes me think of the silence of ignorance, of naivety, of the people who send children to fight and offer one minute of silence in return.

Though I speak a lot, and make my views known day to day, my actions are silent; I am without action in many ways.
I am ignorant in many ways, aren’t we all?
For all the noise there is, there is still too much silence
And one minute will never be enough.

To think of silence in a social or environmental injustice context……….

The idea of silence has been raised often on this course.
Powerful acts of silence
The silence of inaction
The silencers

To speak of silence you must also consider listening.
Listening to others
Listening to those who are silenced
Listening to yourself

I regularly find myself referencing lines from folk songs; my alternate education. Stories told with emotion, lessons to learn, another view of history, a way to remember battles fought, won and continued.
Peggy Seeger sings the song of choice:

Early in the year the seeds are growing
Unseen, unheard they lie beneath the ground
Would you know before the leaves are showing that with weeds all your garden will abound

If you close your eyes, stop your ears close your mouth how can you know? For seeds you cannot hear may not be there, seeds you cannot see may never grow

In January you’ve still got the choice
You can cut the leaves before they start to bud.
If you leave them to grow high they’ll silence your voice and then in December you may pay with your blood

So close your eyes, stop your ears, close your mouth and take it slow, let others take the lead and you bring up the rear and later you can say you didn’t know.

These words speak of fascism but for me they teach a broader message;
Listen to the voices you’d rather not hear as well as the ones you would.
Listen to yourself and don’t be hesitant or afraid to act.
There is nothing more terrifying than being silenced

Ideas of silence are so complicated. I struggle with this.
It’s a difficult thing to articulate; appropriately so I suppose.

Back then to the questions we talked about
How does listening to yourself feel?
And to add,
How does silence feel?

I was recently in a situation when someone, wanting me to sign up for something, urged me ‘not to listen to my inner voice’ he was referring to the voice which told me ‘don’t sign up, this is a money driven scheme, and I don’t trust the ethics of the organisation’ I don’t know if I exactly believe in souls but at that point the power of what he was so flippantly asking me to do struck home and it was as if he were asking me to turn off the part of myself on which I utterly rely, this man whom I had not even spoken to face to face, a stranger was asking me to hear his voice above my own. How terrifying this felt for me, how absurd. But it led me to think.

We are regularly urged not to listen to ourselves and many people are very good at it. The powers of the world would love to see us trade in our inner voices, become simpler to control.

I heard a radio show debate recently about humanism. It was described as arrogant and foolish by two religious representatives who felt that listening to humanity rather than the voice of god was a terrifying and dangerous thing. They fought a very convincing case and I can see why; to trust yourself utterly is a big responsibility, if you’re wrong you solely bear the weight of the consequences. If you give up your voice to a mass movement however, you are (supposedly) devoid of responsibility for those choices and the actions you make in their name.

We spoke about this earlier on in the course, aren’t these systems, the one’s which buy or trade our inner voices, the same systems which give permission for people to play a part in regimes such as the Holocaust or as Dan drew parallels to big corporations such as Shell and BP?

Every day another vulture takes flight
There’s another danger born every morning
In the darkness of your blindness the beast will learn to bite
How can you fight if you can’t recognise a warning?

So close your eyes, stop your ears, close your mouth and take it slow, let others take the lead and you bring up the rear and later you can say you didn’t know.

So instead we choose to listen.

To the mass movements, to individual voices, to those who can’t be heard, to those who we aren’t meant to hear, and we use our inner voice as a guide. We listen to as many things as we possibly can and we trust our physical instincts.

The stomach, the sickness, the nervous excitement, the beating heart, the energy of panic, the reddened face, the pitch of a raised voice, the uncontrollable tears and the ones which fall silently and unnoticed.

This is when we know we must act.

How to act and to what degree?
Is there a point at which we must stop listening in order to act?

‘Left’ organisations are regularly criticised for their (supposed) inability to get things done due to the inner fighting and crippling discussions. A friend of mine tells a story of how he left a local anarchist group, such was his irritation that it took them up to half an hour to decide through methods of consensus whether or not to buy a new ‘pritt stick’ in order to complete the task they had started.

I once witnessed an enormous up cry when an anti-nuclear campaign group discovered that one of its staff member’s fathers had been a Bolshevik. To me this meant very little but they took it so seriously. Can you listen too much? At what point does listening stop you from acting?

No doubt: No awakening
Little doubt: Little awakening
Great doubt: Great awakening
(Too much doubt: Paralysis)

Through this course some big things have come up for me at work. I deeply dislike the way the art world is run. Private and commercial profit, private ownership, tokenistic programmes to tick black and white boxes and cultural correction programmes. I could go on.

Discussion seems fruitless, met with defensiveness, no time to prioritise such things over money. Patrons to please.

My instinct is to get out. I don’t want to be a desk killer, don’t want to convince myself that I am part of the solution if I am not. The attraction is to position myself in a place where I can debate the problems of my great grandfather’s political alignments and to feel that safely we have all eventualities covered. But isn’t change meant to be difficult?

I cannot draw a conclusion. I have many more questions than answers. I know that in many ways I am privileged to have time to debate concepts of silence and choice.

The leaves are all around us and they’re growing
It will soon be too late for the knife
If you leave them on the winds, that around the world are blowing
You may pay for your silence with your life.

Close your eyes, stop your ears, close your mouth and never dare, and if it happens here, they’ll never come for you, because they’ll know you really didn’t care.

hello im back..

hello every one , just back from italy with beuy , hope all of you are well , here a couple pic ,
PS. who has not got a 121 set up with me?
x x x franko

Enough moaning....

Right, now I’ve got my grumbly bit out of the way……

Steven’s post got me thinking…the post from the beginning of this month….
About the other, the different, the change that gets us working….and yes, I think often it is, but probably only because it allows us to escape from routine, from the shit that fills everyday life even though we don’t want it to. However, I really disagree that art is a habit. I don’t think the struggle is to get the habit down and under control. I do not want art to be a habit for me. I really dislike the idea of art being a habit- the making, doing, seeing…experiencing….i don’t want it to be a habit. I don’t want it to fit into my life as such. When I make work, I think I am freed up from everything habit. If I think about being at Wysing in particular, being there was not habit, nothing about my days were habit, or even that familiar I don’t think. My clothes were muddy, often damp from having been outside…. This is not habit, this is freedom, escape, out of routine, expectations…. Those things that I see that provoke a response that isn’t just my recognising it and noting in my head, but actually not being so fucking lazy as I normally am and allowing myself the time to be there, to spend time, and to go with it. Habit is brushing my teeth before going to bed, despite not really feeling like it. Habit is getting up to go to work. Habit is putting things back in the same place time and again.

I want my work to remain outside of all this habit stuff. I want it to make me feel alive and excited, and outside of all those things that tie me down to life, tie me down even if I am not exactly happy with it. Of course, I think there are habits within one’s practice, the way we approach things is often similar, or there are traces that run from one piece of work to the next, or unite them all as yours.

If making art is habit, then surely the time is already there….actually I guess that’s what you’re saying. That it’s a habit, but the struggle is making time for it. But isn’t that a contradiction? Habits don’t need time put aside, they’re just there, because we do them without thinking. Art needs time. Time for ideas to bring themselves together….for things to emerge, for conversations, the unexpected things that seem to make sense, have an affinity….

But yes, I think you’re right. Time or money. And why is it that when we have one, we long for the other more? Only to realise when (if) we get it that actually the grass looks greener on the other side again?

lost

Hello

Sorry I have been absent for a while. I feel like I am in a pit at the moment, and I'm having difficulty pulling myself out....getting a level pespective on everything. Oh, how very melodramtic of me!!!

No, seriously, I am feeling a bit lost with everything. My head is telling me to get on with things, get out there, feel excited. But my head isn't engaging with the rest of me. You know when you're on the tube and just as the doors open the tannoy tell syou to mind the gap between the train and the platform. I was with my boyfriend at teh time, and he turned to me and said ' mind the gap between reality and your expectations'. The fact that he said it seems irrelevant, but it has crept into my thoughts over the last couple of weeks. What my head tells me to do and what I actually do are so distanced.

I have become a hermit I think. I had so wanted to be in London this weekend and see some exhibitions, but I didn't. I spent the weekend at home. Not doing anything from the ever so long to do list..... so the pit just feels deeper.

I hope this doesn't sound like abstract drivelling on.... when we were at Wysing I remember speaking to Shabs outside the kitchen door, about getting to where you need to be, moving on, maybe away... and I truly believed what I was saying. But now, now I am not so sure. Do you think it's true that if you don't believe in something you'll fall for anything? I am not sure I know what I want or where I want to be. I am aware of expectations often, but if I am titally honest I don't know where I want to be, or doing what....
i got a rejection for the residency I applied for at bedford Contemporary Art and I felt relieved in a way. If I had been accepted it would mean giving up my job.... stability, comfort- (not so much physical, but mental),....but now...what now?

In my last one to one we spoke about just getting away for a while, maybe travelling or living abroad. My immediate reaction was no way, but within hours it seemed to make sense....and now.....well, I still kid myself it is a realistic opton, but I oush it into the future, so it only exists as a vague possibility. And maybe it's not right for the moment, but how on earth do I know if I am not just outting everything off until tomorrow, only for tomorrow never to come.


Shit, this does all sound very dull. I wanted to write something, show my face as such. But actually I have little to say of interest.

I felt really angry yesterday and chucked things about my room like a child having a tantrum. Frustration that there is such a vast gap between reality and life in my head. and if I could scream at teh top of my voice, and angry heavy scream, and it exist as that on this blog I would....but instead here is this lousy post.....AArrrgggghhhh!!!!!!!!!

But I did have some things to say in response to a couple of other posts.... so I will do and find them I think.

With much love to you all, you are all in my thoughts, despite my being lost in a pit.
Katherine.

Hi,
lots of birthdays. Jim's birthday is also on 1st . It's his 30th , but we are celebrating on the Friday, so maybe I can make Wednesday. We are holding a Birthday Bash at On The Rocks in Shoreditch, sort of opposite Jaguar Shoes, on Friday 3rd November. I would love everyone to come , we can celebrate all November Birthdays and it would be a great opportunity to get together.
Franko, would it be possible to arrange our 1 2 1 near the end of this month or early Oct??? Whenever is good with you.
Quite glad I missed Frieze. I would probably come away feeling angry about it all commercially and also feeling annoyed about lack of time to make work....

xxxx

It's all about birthdays...

hello,
There are alot of these about at the moment, Steven I think your's might be the day before mine!
Anyway, mine is on Wednesday 1 november and i know it's the middle of the week but if any of you would like to join me in some food, good company and wine I'll be having a few freinds over on the wednesday night.
Would be really lovely to see you all.
its Dorchester court on herne hill, there are buses from Elephant and castle to my door so although its south its not impossible! SE24 9QY for journey planners.
Big hugs
rachel xxx

North of the Border

Hello all.

Firstly, so sorry to not be very visible on the blog. I"ve been checking in, just kinda having a tough and overwhelming and full-on time.

So, I'm in Glasgow at the moment, doing a live art residency at the Centre for Contemporary Art. I have a beautiful space, which is huge, and empty save me and some collected stuff. Which I'm loving. Good to have a break from reality! I'm two weeks in, and thoroughly enjoying researching ideas in a very loose ended way.



Fuck. I"m drunk and in a city that is not my home. Thrilling and sobering at the same time.

And what of my time here, creatively? Well, I am hanging out in charity shops with all the other dispossessed. And that feels damn fine. And I have a big old red suitcase that was my grans. And maybe I'll hang out with that, and see if owt comes of it.



Journeys. Into my families past. My history in the east end of this town. Talking to my favourity aunty, and covetting her broad glasgae accent. This city is so fucking beautiful. I kind of feel this profound sense of connection with this place, which I never felt before. And my poor worker forebear relatives. Today I saw the former carpet factory both my grans worked in. It is fucking amazing; somebody built it grand. And now it is luxury apartments. Let's take the buildings the workers toiled to make grand, and make them into inaccessible temples to extreme capatalism, and those who are able to own the city. Obscene.



I've spent time at my aunties, she, who cared for others her entire life, and now lives in a part of the city with few buses, people stuck there, with no shops, no transport after 8pm. I secretly record bits of our conversations on my digital camera. For the richness of her voice. For her absolute being-ness of herself. For the voice of one who was never heard in the world, caring for my grandmother, and then her brother, until he died a month ago.



If I had to pick out threads of resonance of my time here, my visits to my aunties once or twice a week would be key. Sitting at the kitchen table, her conversation interspersed with references to god, and his mercy, because this side of the family are working class catholic, and god is present in a very everyday way, with holy water in the house, and religious statues. Despite my rejection of my 'faith' as a teenager, I can in this context, appreciate how church plays a part in this community. It is social. Making sense of tough lives. My auntie went to church quiz and bingo last night.



And my time around elderly people in charity shops. The east end, where half my family are from. Traditionally a working class area, folks would pretty much live there their entire lives. Now, artists have been moving in, due to cheaper rent etc. An interesting mix. So, I hang out, getting the vibe from the elderly folk. Interesting. Wondering about the possibilities of setting up some kinda artist in residence thing.... Have been mapping shops and experiences...

I'll end here lovely people. Hope to see you all soon.

Love and Girl-drag in all it's Fucking Glory
xxxxx Lucille

Getting Tekkey on your ass....

Ok, half a bottle of wine later (Rachel, you are right, blogging is much more fun with alcohol) I was doing some research about how we can all get updates, like the forum, when someone posted, we got notfied. I think I cracked it. Check out the email link on the right. Subscribe to de-mentored using feed burner and in theory, you will be notified of updates or changes to the blog, fingers crossed!!

Speeding at 1000 miles an hour... xo

has anyone heard of...

an artist called Kembra Pfhaler?
A friend was telling me about her, she sounds really intersting and I'd like to know more..
xxxx

feminist films, life, wine and inspiration!

hello everyone,
I've had such a hectic time recently, It's been quite unsettling. a crazy whirlwind of events and happenings and too much information.

Katherine thank you for your comments about the job stuff, to keep you posted, It's a job working for a grant giving trust (a really great one that I respect a lot) focussing on young people aged 14-19. the pay is outrageous and makes me feel certain that I wont get it, its over double my current salary! but I've written a personal statement and been put forward by the head hunters so fingers crossed!

Whether this comes through or not it has forced me to think about the furture, Franko I know you want me to work on a strategy and i feel that my job is destroying me. I love it but it's draining every drop of energy I have, not just at the moment but for a long time, the Frieze VIP thing today was awful. i worry about my mental health!

i've been reading this book called 'refusing to be a man' by John Stoltenberg. I recommend it to everyone. I have had to take a break after reading the first two essays because of the power of the content. It tears the world apart, rips down the curtains and shows you reality.

We watched a load of films tonight which we are considering for the feminist film festival, some really brilliant ones, my favourite was 'sisters in law' very funny/serious/exhilirating film about female judges in cameroon dealing wonderfully with men who rape and abuse women and children.

Franko, we watched 'female fist' by Gritt, this was excellent and definately going to be included, I'm going to see if she'd like to come over here for the screening.

I found Gritts film really inspiring, just made me think, what am I sitting around waiting for? Why don't I get on with my work! it doesn't have to be complicated, this institutional hangover is harder to shake than I realised, why does everything have to be finished and presentable (and saleable?) this whole frieze thing is a good example of what I'm talking about, its a mass market for selling work, the work is presented on temporary wooden boards, gallerists produce photocopies of artworks for potential buyers with £10k price tags. where is the art? is this what it's all about? And i'm not even allowed to say this stuff.

Have made plans to go with a friend of mine.... in disguise....communist style! yeeeehaaaa!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

hhheeeeelllloooo

Hi,
Thanks for the blogger invite. we can all see who's written what now. I still haven't managed to upload images from my mac, Madeline, how did you manage it??
Miranda, Happy Birthday darlin' I can't get hold of you. Keep trying to ring. Have you changed your phone?
Franko, I need tocheck about teh 23rd. Are you free on Sundays atall? Hope you are well. I've sent a gorgeous picture of you and Beuy to Francis for the website. I would prefer a later date as I've been busy with a few things. College being one of them and we had bad news last week. The woman selling the flat to us pulled out the day before exchange. We lost all the money for the fees etc and now have to start againn and find a property quickly while we still have the mortgage. Bit of a nightmare.
Is anyone going to Frieze? I'm thinking of booking a ticket. Has anyone been down the slides at Tate?
Hope everyone ios well,
Ninaxxx

Personal Blogger Account

Hi All

Did you all get the email from blogger? The email was inviting you to have your own account to access de-mentored, which means your name is attached to any posting you do.

I see Rachel did and acted on it. If you didn't get it, I can resend. Any hassle just give a shout here.

ttfn
Steven

ps Rachel, the Barge trip sounds cool, I will see if I am up. My Birthday is on Halloween.....

how do you get it not sideways....

aha. good.

please, at last

testing testing

feminist fundraising

Hello friends,
Some of you came and enjoyed last years reclaim the night’s fundraiser, this year the boat will travel! And be Halloween themed, its also a few days before my birthday so could be a wee celebration of sorts.

I know £20 is a hefty sum but the drinks are super cheap, the music and dancing fun and the revolution will come at a price to us all!

Let me know if you’d like to come and I’ll do a bulk ticket order.
In solidarity, Rachel xxx


Most canal-worthy and fun-loving friends!It's time once more to invite you to a fabulous floating fundraiser - this time to raise money for this year's Reclaim The Night march and the Feminist Film Festival (showing at the Curzon Bloomsbury) which launches it. These events are being organised by the London Feminist Network to celebrate the International Day To End Violence Against Women.The fundraiser will be held on Saturday 28th October from 8pm. The venue is the Beauchamp Lodge canal boat, moored behind Paddington station.We'll be having plenty of Halloween fun: the barge will cruise down the canal, through the unearthly landscapes and inhuman cries of London Zoo, to the, um, unearthly landscapes and inhuman cries of Camden on a Saturday night.Onboard entertainment will include:DJs!Live music!Party games!
Tarot reading!Face painting!Cheap booze!And to top it all, the barge will be horribly - gruesomely - decorated by hideous artists from The Society Of Wonders. An exclusive installation of theirs is not to be missed - the Society's work is currently being showcased at the National Theatre and the Tate Britain.All this and that warm-inside good-conscience feeling for just £20 (waged) or £15 (unwaged/student/needy) - you know it makes sense! Places are strictly limited to a maximum of 55 so book NOW to avoid disappointment - they'll go quickly but we need to sell them all to make the night a success. All moneys go to the Reclaim The Night march and the Feminist Film Festival in November.If you're interested get in touch Becca (07976 623706) or with me - Rachel

Making a JPEG from a Video Image

Hi guys...does anyone know how? I have the image, but can't upload on blog as it is a DV still?

Love

Shabzxx

Riding The Crest of A wave and trusting in yourself

Dearest Mentee's, Mentor and Colleagues

Sorry that I haven't been in touch for a week. First My system was down and secondly I am deeply in it if you see what I mean! My 'going into peoples' homes and interviewing has continued as part of my Speaker's Corner research, and I met with Frances and Franko last week which was great. I feel really positive and am once again having fun making work. Though I am really busy with several projects, most of them are my own, and it's coming together nicely, though I don't even have time to scratch my head...It's all good though, you get me? I am doing something every day, and I really want to do an MA in Visual Studies/Visual Culture too, so please suggest suitable places that I might research. Love you all. Be in touch soon.

Shabby Dabby x

There and back again...

One thing that is preoccupying me at the moment is time. The more i rationalise and plan my time, the more I feel like someone else, somebody who doesn't have time to play. Maybe I need to schedule it in. I have been to a lot of meetings of late, a trip to Liverpool for the opening of the Biennial, spent an afternoon looking at live art in Newlyn, met up briefly with Lucille, hosting my Father from the US, tried to get to Bristol for a conference, missed the train, had a meeting with Frances, nearly missed my train back to Cornwall, bumped into Franko on the stairs, drank Gin (thank you Franko), got interviewed, worried about not blogging, sent off an ACE application, saw Shabz stuff from California and wanted to immediately move back, asked boyfriend if he would consider applying for American citizenship.

Liverpool Biennial 2006


Is it the other, the different, the change that gets us working? Is it the desire to move from our selves and mark the change? I think so. Wysing was very telling for us. We were able to step outside ourselves, our domestic and work situations. Also, there was no expectation. Franko did not put any pressure on us apart from to try something new (get up early, don't talk too much and don't get drunk, at least until then end). I think making art is a habit. The struggle is to get the habit down and under control. We all saw each other working, be it on a bench or in a shed or at a distance (I have an abiding memory of Rachel standing furtively at the side of the lane near the gate to the field, trying to look nonchalant).

I am starting to get to a point where I can feel a buzz or a hum in my head. I feel like I am nearly at a point when being an artsit is a habit, not quite under control. After Wysing, then Liverpool, I could see what my work is (at the moment) and where it needs to go and develop. Time. I have been making some for myself, but then I have never been poorer. Time or money.

Hussle, hussle, hussle..


Franko Mixing those funky beats


TECH

I am going to invite you all to be team members on the blog. You will get an email from blogger that you need to respond to. If you have a account, use this to log in and you will have de-mentored as part of your blog list. If you do not have an account with blogger, don't worry, you will be prompted to create one. You will then log in with your own blogger account. This should sort out all the recent hassles.

Mad, ring me, I will talk you though any of your MAC problems. Katherine your you know what is in the post, and I am seeing the Salt Gallery this weekend, so you are the top of the conversation, also did you see the email from BCA?

Really sorry about your Grandmother. Mine died 4 years ago. I was the last to see her alive. She won't leave you, your memories get tidied up, and will pop into your head all the time.

later guys....

Photos

I was watching some of the video I filmed at Wysing over the weekend and I seemed to have got so much more than I thought. Some of the images will go on the website if I remember rightly, but I wanted to post some here too.....there were things that I did whilst I was at Wysing that I never really talked about, (Ok, so i guess I didn't do vast amounts of talking, but then I never really do), but I wanted to share some things here...maybe you can all see links that I can't!?

When we all went for a walk on the Sunday to just have a look round there were all these black slugs in the grass. I think sometimes wehn I see things/places/spaces I immediately know I want to use them somehow. The black slugs...they were so black, like wet black...on the Monday morning I was sat in the barn on teh green cushion by the door reading this Vanessa Beecroft book I have had for ages, but never read and I had ideas in my head of things I might do during the week...the slugs were one thing...just standing in the rain was another...and then it seemed so ridiculous that I was saving these things up for another day when I could just get on with them.... So I went and sat on one of the benches in the far corner at teh front and had this slug on my arm- my skin is so white, I don't realise it at times, but in this video my arms aren't instantly recognisable as arms, and I like that- they're obviously boldily I think, but maybe not arms.....and it is probably not something I will ever show, but just doing it, having this thing on my arm, sitting in the rain, hair all over teh place, wet feet and just breathing it all in. GIVING MYSELF TIME without rushing onto the next thing.

Also hanging from the tree. When Steven and I went off on MOnday afternoon to talk about our work about collaboration, I must admit I was really uneasy about it. I believe in collaboration, and for some people it works, but for me..... I don't know. I can't help but feel Skeptical(?) about it..... it doesn't feel like my work, it feels compromised.....I don't know how to explain it exactly, and I do not want to just sound rude at all- Steven this is in no way a reflection of teh afternooon- I had fun just doing stuff, just having someone to do it with and play, and fill the afternoon without intentionally trying to fill time.

I think this is getting really long...maybe I'll post some different images another night....

I hope everyone is well....what's everyone up to?

With love to you all, take care, Katherine.

hello everyone,
I've also been disapeared. Am currently drunk and loving you all! (think this is the hassard of blog- people stay in on their own, get drunk and go on-line)

Life hectic for me, I got head hunted for a new job! Yikes! its a weird world. Had to do my cv super fast which took all my time for the last 4 days. this stuff is hard hey?!

I've started a course in SOMA, a Brazillian anarchist therapy, it 'refreshes the parts capitalism steals from you' (needed!) have you heard of Paulo Friere and Augusto Boal? well the guy who created SOMA was a contemporary of them so it's similar sort of thing. I like it.

i've also been helping my friend charlotte to build a massive structure for her annimation set shes's shooting on film its very exciting (5x4meters square) its hard core construction for us as it's not our usual line of business!

Got my ideas for further video works but will explain to you when in a more sober state.

By the way, Bloody hell! I can't work out how to do that put a name to your post thing. I ebven already have a blogg with eblogg or whatever its called and I still cant suss it. any advice very welcome :)

Big hugs to you all,
Love Rachel xxxxx

Great , back on,
Hi, apologies for disappearing for a while. I've just started a course at Rada and it's really full on. It has kind of taken over, thank god it's only a year. I have learnt a lot so far anyway, however really yearning for my own work.
I've met some really great people,some very pretentious people too as expected, but there really is a creative buzz about the place. Also very surreal, people like Richard Attenboruogh and Alan Rickman are just wondering about the place.
I keep drifting in and out of thinking 'should I be doing this course, when I want to be an artist?' However it will be as Miranda reminded me (thankyou:)) that it is another skill. I need to make money to support my practice.

I have also discovered expanding foam! it's amazing. It comes in liquid form and expands to 25 times it's size. Endless possiblities. Thinking that this could be a way of creating sculptural forms fairly cheaply . It's self growing properties will be great to video. So need to play with this. Also how to make a glowing fire from wirewool and a battery, really try it.
I'm thinking about our time at Wysing and the possibilites of scaling up my work.

I'm really loving reading the blog. Katherine , thankyou for sharing your memories about your Grandmother. Really touching and hope you're ok. Big hugs. Beautiful pictures. x

I went to Rome last weekend and now I 'm completely in love with Italy. The best pizza ever and so much beautiful sculpture and painting. Photos soon, but I have to load them on a different computer, I'm having the same trouble as Maddie. It must be safari.

Ninax

WE ARE BACK ON..

here a sweet photos of all of you , . WHERE ARE YOU ?